Interview with emmagrant01

[kitty_fic]

Our next hd_writers interview is with emmagrant01, author of Left My Heart and Surrender the Grey.


Approximately how many stories would you say you've written for fandom? Original work?
I've written at least 125 fics that have been posted online somewhere. Around 85 of those were in the Harry Potter fandom, and the rest were Star Wars, Star Trek, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel. No original fic, though! I love writing fanfic, and I honestly have no interest in writing original fiction.

How long on average are your stories? Do you prefer to write shorter fics or longer? Why?
Well, let's see… there are 102 fics posted on my web site (link: http://www.queerasjedi.net/emma) (all the Queer as Jedi fics are archived separately), and there are a total of 880,222 words in those fics, so that makes an average of around 8600 words per fic. That seems accurate, actually. I have a handful of fics that are 40K+ words and some that are 1000-ish words, but most of what I write seems to be close to that average.
I think I most enjoy writing fics that are in the 12-15-K range. They tend to be plotty but not overly complex, and I'm able to write something like that in a few weeks. The longer fics I've written have taken months (if not years) to write, and it's a challenge to sustain my passion for one story for that long. RL gets in the way, as do other fandom interests.

Where do you find your inspiration?
It comes from a lot of different places. Sometimes an idea will just pop in my head and I'll play with it for a while before writing it. Sometimes a movie or a TV show I watch will spark an idea that works its way into a fic. But these days there are so many fests and challenges going on all the time that it's not even necessary to come up with my own ideas that often! I really enjoy writing for a particular prompt given by someone else. It's fun to take that idea and try to create something that satisfies the original prompter, or even surprises her.

What's the first thing you do when an idea comes to you?
I think about it. I spend weeks, if not months, mulling over an idea and playing with it in my head before I ever open a word document and start writing. I let scenes play out while I'm driving or taking a shower, or at night while I'm waiting to go to sleep -- anytime when I don't have a husband or child needing my attention. I generally have a good deal of the story worked out in my mind before I start writing.

Do you have to be in the zone to write or is it more about consistency and discipline?
I definitely have to be "in the zone". I tend to get obsessed with an idea for a fic, and then it stays in my head until I can write it down. When I was a kid I would write to get the stories out, almost to exorcise them. At the time I didn't understand why that happened to me when it didn't happen to anyone else I knew. I thought I was just weird, heh. Now I know that's a common thing that writers experience. But I have a hard time sitting down and making myself write if I'm not in that place of being obsessed with a story. I can do it, but it's never as much fun as when I'm completely driven to write a fic. This is why I'll never be a professional writer, LOL.

How many fics do you typically work on at a time?
Just one. With the obsession thing, I really only have space in my head for one at a time. Of course, there are lots of unfinished fics on my hard drive, ones that I lost my direction on and never went back to. I always say I'll finish them, and I occasionally do.

How do you like to work? Quiet? Music? Where?
Ah, to get to choose that! Most of my writing gets done after everyone else has gone to sleep, in a comfy chair in the bedroom with a little tiny light. That's generally the only time I have to write. Otherwise there are other people who need my attention.

Do you have a writing schedule or routine? (Everyday? Certain time of day? Certain number of words? Number of minutes?
I write when there is time, basically. If everyone goes to sleep and I'm still awake and have enough energy, and if it's not so late that I'll regret it the next morning, I write. I write until I start falling asleep, or until a small child wakes up and needs me to snuggle with him, that sort of thing.

What are your writing habits?
I'm not sure I have any, to be honest!

Do you force yourself to write even when you don't want to?
Only if there is a deadline looming. But I'm generally so obsessed with the story that I'm happy to have a chance to work on it!

Do you keep a handwritten journal?
No. I write almost nothing by hand anymore, come to think of it.

Do you plan or outline your stories in any way? Can you describe your process?
I usually spend a lot of time thinking about the story before I ever open a word document and start writing. I like to have a strong sense of who the characters are and how the story will go before I commit any words to the screen. With long fics I'll often start by writing a synopsis that stays at the end of the fic. I delete parts of it as I write them, so there's always a synopsis of what's left to write. I will sometimes spend all of my writing time on a particular night working on the synopsis, rather than actually writing. The story generally deviates from the synopsis in significant ways, but seeing where it's generally going helps me keep my focus. With shorter stories that synopsis is in my head and I never write it down, but in general I'm fleshing out a synopsis when I write a fic.

I tend to write very linearly as well. The fic plays in my head almost like a movie, and so I write scene-by-scene. When I open the file to write, I usually start by re-reading the last few scenes and editing them before I move on. Each scene gets multiple passes that way. I tend to write major action and dialogue, and then on the next pass I'll add in more details, edit the dialogue, and so on. It's sort of a one step forward, two steps back process, but it's all done linearly. I'm not the sort of person who can write the last scene first. I need to go through the whole story with the characters in order to be able to write them at the end. I suppose it's not well-formed-enough in my head for that.

When the fic is done, I'll tend to read over it a few more times, mostly making small changes. I do a comma pass, for example -- I tend to write with way too many commas and have to delete them later. If it's a short fic I'll often skip having it beta'd, but the longer ones really need a second or third pair of eyes on them. I feel fairly confident about my SPAG skills and there's very little of that to worry about after so many re-reads. What I really hope for from a beta is a critical look at character development, consistency, how the plot proceeds, and things like that. I love it when betas pick fics apart and hand them back to me!

What motivates you to keep writing?
Deadlines, often! But usually it's just that obsessive drive to finish a story.

How do you stay excited about your writing?
I guess I love the process of seeing the story take form. I love living in the world of the characters, thinking about them all the time, and imagining what might happen next in their world. It's exciting to work through a story idea I'm passionate about and I almost always feel a loss when the story is finished and posted. I love seeing the reaction of readers, but I'm sad that my time with those characters is over. I have no idea how JKR let those characters go after all those years of writing the books. I think I would have been horribly depressed.

How do you stay focused while working on longer fics?
Obsession and deadlines, sometimes self-imposed deadlines, like when I wrote Left My Heart and Surrender the Grey and posted chapters on a regular schedule. I made myself do that to get through it, but I haven't written anything so long since. But obsession is definitely an important factor.

Do you find deadlines stressful or helpful?
Helpful, actually. I've always been very deadline-oriented. I'm the sort of person who gets a lot done when I have a lot going on, and less done when I have lots of time. It's a paradox. When I was in college, I would always start huge sewing or crafting projects in the middle of studying for finals, which drove my boyfriend (now husband) crazy. But there was something about adding one more thing to my busy schedule that helped me focus on studying. It's similar with writing fic, somehow.

What is your biggest challenge in writing and how do you overcome it?
I have to pick just one? ;-) I think one big thing I'm working on these days is learning to develop and sustain complex novel plots, and to do it in ways that are at least somewhat original. I know that the best way to learn to do that is to read good stories (and professional fiction), then write and get feedback on my work. It's definitely a challenge for me to read non-fanfic works, because I just don't have a heck of a lot of free time. The free time I've got I want to spend in fandom, so I'm spinning my wheels a bit on that one.

Do you have a system for organizing your story ideas and notes?
People do that? Unless you count the folders on my laptop that contain in-progress fics and posted fics, I guess not. A long time ago I kept a list of fic ideas, but I lost it somewhere along the way. Maybe my floating synopsis falls into this category?

Do you have your story planned from start to finish or do you just start writing and let the rest work itself out?
It depends. I generally have a strong sense of where the story is going, but haven't worked out all of the details, and those just happen along the way. I almost always know how the story will end (with Harry and Draco in bed, usually), but the path to the ending can sometimes change significantly from my original plan. I don't worry too much about sticking to the synopsis; if a better idea comes up I go with it and see where it takes me.

What are your tips to overcoming writer's block/slump?
Sign up for a fest! Every time I've wanted to write but couldn't think of anything, I've gotten an amazing prompt for a fest. When I'm halfway through a story and get stuck, the obsession kicks in nicely to help me out. I just think about and play out possible scenes, sometimes for weeks, until something clocks. If I have a deadline, sometimes I'll just make myself write one more scene, just to see where it goes. When that one scene is done I'll put the computer away and come back to it the next night, re-read, and try to write just one more scene. Eventually those scenes start to lead somewhere, and even if a lot of it later gets deleted, just writing some mundane shit about the characters seems to keep the process going, somehow.

What do you do if you lose interest in a fic? Especially if you are writing for a deadline?
I don't think this has happened to me, mostly because I work well with deadlines. ;-) Every half-finished fic I've got sitting on my hard drive was something that was not for a fest, now that I think about it. If it's not for a fest and I lose interest, I generally set it aside and don't worry too much about it. Sometimes I just need a little space and then I'll get obsessed with it again.

What sources or websites do you find helpful for writing tips and information?
The HP wiki is really useful for checking canon information. There are several British slang sites I looks at when I'm trying to figure out if a word is appropriate or not. I do a lot of research on locations, and spend time looking at tourist websites and studying maps of towns my characters are going to visit. In the case of Left My Heart and Surrender the Grey, I actually traveled to the locations to do research. I added on a weekend in London to a business trip to France, and spent the whole time mapping out where Draco would live and what bars they would go to and so on.

Do you share your writing process along the way with a support group of friends, betas or cheerleaders?
No, not lately, anyway. When I wrote LMH and STG I had a team of betas that I was sending stuff off to constantly, and their feedback was immensely helpful. In a sense both of those fics were written in public, because I posted the rough drafts to my LJ chapter by chapter, collected lots of feedback from readers, and then used that to edit the final draft. Those fics wouldn't have been the same without all of those people reading along and encouraging me! But writing has been a much more solitary experience for me since. And I can't say that I mind. There was something really intense about writing a fic essentially in public, knowing that all of my mistakes were on display for everyone to see. I would occasionally read fairly unkind comments online about those fics while I was writing and posting them, and it was frustrating because even though they weren't finished, they were being treated as if they were. Not that it mattered in the long run, of course. 

I love the concept of a word war, but I don't have time to participate in things like that right now. I wish I did, but I just can't predict when I'm going to have large chunks of time to write.

Have you ever co-written a story with someone?
One of my first big fandom projects was "Queer as Jedi" (link: http://www.queerasjedi.net) , which was a sort of parody of Queer as Folk set in an AU of the Star Wars prequels universe. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon (and lots of other Jedi you wouldn't recognize unless you know the extended universe) are still Jedi, but spend their weekends hanging out in a gay club on Coruscant, with all kinds of QAF-like drama. They have lots of sex with lots of people, that sort of thing. It was incredibly fun to write, and there were five of us involved in the writing over the two years we worked on it.

What's it like to co-write?
In that case, we just took turns writing the episodes of the story. We did some planning of where it was all going in the sense that there were agreed-upon big story arcs, but we generally just made it up as we went along! It was fun for a lot of reasons, but the co-writing aspect made it feel like we were all just writing for each other. The best part of the process was seeing the reaction of the other writers to the first draft of an episode, I think because we were all so, so invested in the characters and where the story was going. It was incredibly exciting to see that next episode pop up in my inbox for beta, because I knew it would affect the next one I wrote. The comments from readers later on were almost anti-climatic after the beta discussions we had!

How does your process differ when co-writing?
I haven't co-written anything in a long time, but it was interesting to work with multiple writers' ideas about characters and where the plot should go. When you write alone, it's all about what's inside your own head, but when you write with other people, so much of that has to be made explicit and discussed, even before any writing has begun. I think I would have a much harder time co-writing now because I tend to be very selfish about my characters and my stories. It would be hard for me to give up control of them like that when I have a very strong (obsessions-driven) idea of where I want the story to go. But on the other hand, writing with other people is a lot of fun and rewarding in its own way. It's great to be part of something that you aren't solely responsible for!

How have you evolved as a writer over time?
I think I've evolved quite a lot. I'm not good at putting words together in the ways that some writers are. I read some authors' work and I'm blown away by the images they create with just a few words, like artists might do with the stroke of a brush. I don't have that kind of talent, so what I try to focus on is telling good stories. I try to tell them as cleanly and with as little extraneous information as possible. My style tends to be fairly bare-bones simple, and a comment I often get is that it's "easy to read", heh. For the first few years I was in fandom, I just worked on basic writing skills, like ending my adverb abuse problem, streamlining dialogue (I tended to have conversations go on WAY too long and had to learn to cut them in half), learning to show rather than tell (cutting out exposition and backstory whenever possible in favor of dropping hints for readers to piece it together for themselves) and so on. I'm fairly happy with where I've ended up, though there is always room for improvement, of course. In the last few years I've worked harder on describing the setting, streamlining dialogue tags, using fewer commas, that sort of thing.

Despite all of that, I've always been fairly surprised that when I go back and read my old fic that it's not nearly as badly written as I imagine it is! I also find that I don't have much interest in writing novel-length stories anymore. These days the ideas I have for fics tend to be in that 10K range, rather than 60K+. I'm not sure why, but I seem to prefer writing those mod-length fic best.

What is your favorite fic you've written and why is it your favorite?
I think my current favorite is "Fast Forward, Two Steps Back" (link: http://www.queerasjedi.net/emma/fic/viewstory.php?sid=101) . I wrote it for a fest last winter, and it was so very much fin to write. I loved the prompt and became completely obsessed with it, and I utterly fell in love with Harry and Draco in that story. It was quite long at over 36K words, one of the longest fics I've written in years, so I had a lot of time to develop the characters and the plot. I was actually depressed when that story finished, because I knew I would miss those characters!


I hope you found Emma's interview inspiring! If you have additional questions, feel free to ask them in the comments!

Emma will also join us in the HD WRITERS CHAT Thursday night, around 10:30PM CST to offer additional encouragement and support for writers. Join us then!

Another BIG thank you to emmagrant01 for taking the time to share with us! <3

Comments

Ah....

[wemyss.livejournal.com]

A peep inside the place where the magic happens.

One does wish one might attend these chats, but they seem always to be in the wee hours.

I'll ask, therefore, here: have you noticed any difference in style from when (if ever) you wrote anything at all, even notes, by hand, as different to the rhythms of everything-by-keyboard nowadays?

[jakuako.livejournal.com]

It doesn't really surprise me that a lot of what you say here I could apply to myself. Since I pretty much adore everything you've written, this makes sense. Especially the bare-bones bit. <3

Thanks for sharing, Emma!

And by the way, despite you not enjoying the 60+k fics as much, I'll always be hoping that one of your obsessions will turn on you and become a monster. ;) I love getting absorbed in your longer fics!

[sra-danvers.livejournal.com]

So interesting to know! Thanks!

Re: Ah....

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Sorry about the time of the chat! They let me pick the time, and late at night is the only time I could be sure I could give it my full attention (for reasons detailed above).

You know, I haven't written ANYTHING by hand for years. I'm one of those people who is cheering when I hear they aren't teaching cursive writing in school anymore, because my handwriting was always atrocious. I loved writing, but hated the slow process of writing by hand. Typewriters weren't much of a help because I still had to do the writing by hand first. So word processing (which became widely accessible when I was in college) totally liberated me, and I haven't looked back. I love being able to write almost at the speed I think, and to be able to try out ideas and edit them, move them around, delete them, save them in another file for future reference, and so on -- all without the need for scissors, paper, tape, erasers, or whiteout.

It's not uncommon for me to delete a scene from a fic but save it in another file and then later insert it in another fic. (This happened with one of the most recent fics I wrote, which is still anon in the fest it was posted in.) That's hard to do when you write by hand. At least, it is for me!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Hee, thanks! I also tend to be drawn to fic that's written in a similar style as my own, and it makes sense. I tend to write fics I like, and so I'm going to like the fics of people who write in a similar style and with similar themes.

I signed up for the H/D Big Bang this year because I have this massive novel-length H/D fic on my hard drive that I've been working on since book 7 was released. And then I had to drop out because we ended up traveling for 6 weeks right before the due date, and I knew that I wouldn't have time to work on it, realistically. I still hope to finish it, but I have to get obsessed with it again.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reading!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

I like hearing about that too, which is one of the things I've enjoyed about this interview project. I have no formal writing training (other than freshman English in college), so I'm always fascinated to hear about how people who have have training do their work. I'm sure there are better ways to engage in the writing process, but what I do right now works for me. One step at a time! :-)

[celestlyn.livejournal.com]

Hoping you will become obsessed again and finish it for another BB fest. I adore your stories and for me...the longer, the better.

Oh, it's not at all yr fault.

[wemyss.livejournal.com]

Time zones and All That.

And thank you for the answer. I'm old enough to remember - and I've still a forefinger that shows I do - writing by hand, and I even now feel that one wrote different prose (but may simply be mad as a March hare, wh is why asked yr views).

[dracavia]

Wonderful interview, it was really interesting getting a look inside your talented head, Emma (so to speak :D ).

Out of curiosity, what's the question that goes with the following answer, it seams to be missing from the transcript above:

I love the concept of a word war, but I don't have time to participate in things like that right now. I wish I did, but I just can't predict when I'm going to have large chunks of time to write.

[jakuako.livejournal.com]

Oh, you tease! You shouldn't've told me that because I'll be waiting with bated breath until the moment you do get obsessed with it again. xD Too bad that the timing wasn't right, but traveling doesn't seem like a half-bad alternative. ;)

[norton-gale.livejournal.com]

Interesting interview. I'm going to try your "one more scene" tip the next time I get stalled.

Why don't you have any interest in writing original fiction? Or have you not thought much about that? Just curious.

[piratesmile331.livejournal.com]

This is wonderful! Thanks, Emma, for taking the time to answer all these questions!

[pionie.livejournal.com]

Interesting! Thanks for sharing.

[ariannagray.livejournal.com]

Incredibly interesting. Thanks so much for sharing. :D

[magicallioness.livejournal.com]

Thanks for sharing this! I'm intrigued by your obsession about the stories you write. How do you go for such a long time bouncing an idea around in your head without writing anything done? I wouldn't be able to do that for the life of me *lol*.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Actually, that's part of the response the the same question as the paragraph above it. I just started a new paragraph for that one line. :-)

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

I just love writing fanfic, mostly. I've never had the same experience of excitement and obsession when I've tried to write a story solely about characters I've created myself. It's not as fun for me. And there is such an amazing sense of community in fandom, something that (from what I've heard, at least) is just not present in the same way when you write original fiction. Being part of the vibrant and fun-loving fandom community is a huge part of this for me.

The other big reason is that I've always thought that the point of writing original fiction is to get published, and I have zero interest in that. ZERO. That would make writing, my hobby that I love, my job. I already have a job, a career that I love and that I spent five years in grad school preparing for and almost 10 years since working on. I don't want to leave my career to make no money writing original fiction that people may or may not want to read. Instead, I write what I want, when I want, to wind down from the stress of my actual job. I get to write about characters that I and lots of other people love, and I know there is an audience of friends and acquaintances already out there waiting to read and enjoy it. I can't think of a single reason to give that up!

:-)

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reading! It all feels very narcissistic, heh.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for reading it, rambling as it is!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

I guess it's because it's something I've always done? When I was a child I had a really hard time going to sleep at night. My mom says that even when I was 3 or 4 I'd tell her I couldn't "turn my brain off." I would just lie there in the dark and think and think about everything that happened that day, and I would get so wound up that I couldn't sleep. Around age 8 or so I hit on a strategy of making up stories in my head and letting them play in my mind almost like movies. They would always be about favorite characters from movies or books (Star Wars was a big one then), and I would replay the story every night in my head, each time getting a little further until I fell asleep. At some point I decided to write them down, and then I would continue the story in my mind the next night from that point.

And that's kind of what I still do. If I don't spin some elaborate fantasy about Harry and Draco, I'll lie there and stress about work, or I'll start to imagine horrible accidents my son might have. Smexing Harry and Draco in my head is much more fun and relaxing! ;-)

And so I do that with a story until I get to the point that I feel ready to write it. It's part of my going-to-sleep routine for a while, and then one day I'll realize I can't wait to start writing it and I do. Sometimes that happens really quickly, and other times it takes months.

Okay, I'm probably coming across as fairly crazy here. Heh. I can't be the only person who does that...

[sra-danvers.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the rec! I loved Fast Forward!!!

[magicallioness.livejournal.com]

Nope, you don't sound crazy at all. I used to do the exact same when I was a kid, and still 'make up' half of my stories in my head before I go to sleep, or when I'm in the shower, on the toilet, bus, train, etc., etc. Basically every moment my brain's not occupied with something else. I loose them if I don't write them down within a few days though, and I admire your capability of holding onto them for so long :).

[fangirl-07.livejournal.com]

Lovely!

Thanks for playing ;)